{"product_id":"useless-but-unstopable-unisex-hoodie","title":"Useless but Unstopable Unisex Hoodie","description":"Useless? Maybe. Unstoppable? Absolutely.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThis ocean sunfish (mola mola) hoodie is for anyone who’s ever been underestimated, but kept floating anyway. With a playful Y2K-inspired design that doesn’t take itself too seriously, it’s the perfect mix of ironic confidence and chaotic resilience.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nAnd yeah, it just so happens to be ridiculously comfortable too. Like, *“you’ll keep reaching for it every day”* comfortable. This classic streetwear staple features a soft feel, a cozy hood for chilly evenings, and a front pouch pocket for whatever you’re carrying (emotionally or otherwise).\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nBasically: peak comfort, questionable reputation, unstoppable energy.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nDesigned by an artist who’s also a captain and marine naturalist, this piece is part of a bigger journey, your purchase helps support her dream of going to grad school for wildlife forensics.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• 100% cotton face\u003cbr\u003e\n• 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester\u003cbr\u003e\n• Front pouch pocket\u003cbr\u003e\n• Self-fabric patch on the back\u003cbr\u003e\n• Matching flat drawstrings\u003cbr\u003e\n• 3-panel hood\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from Pakistan\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nDisclaimer: This hoodie runs small. For the perfect fit, we recommend ordering one size larger than your usual size. And your friends will be jealous. \u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong class=\"size-guide-title\"\u003eSize guide\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"table-responsive dynamic\" data-unit-system=\"imperial\"\u003e\u003ctable cellpadding=\"5\"\u003e\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCHEST WIDTH (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLENGTH (inches)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e20\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e27\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e21\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e23\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e29\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e25\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e30\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e26 ½\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e31\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e28\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e32\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\u003c\/table\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv class=\"table-responsive dynamic\" data-unit-system=\"metric\"\u003e\u003ctable cellpadding=\"5\"\u003e\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e \u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCHEST WIDTH (cm)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLENGTH (cm)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e50.8\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e68.6\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eM\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e53.3\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e71.1\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e58.4\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e73.7\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eXL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e63.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e76.2\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e2XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e67.3\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e78.7\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e3XL\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e71.1\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd\u003e81.3\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\u003c\/table\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Captain Squidwirth","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":45625988284473,"sku":"8115792_10779","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":45625988317241,"sku":"8115792_10780","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":45625988350009,"sku":"8115792_10781","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":45625988382777,"sku":"8115792_10782","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":45625988415545,"sku":"8115792_10783","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":45625988448313,"sku":"8115792_13416","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ S","offer_id":45625988481081,"sku":"8115792_11496","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ M","offer_id":45625988513849,"sku":"8115792_11497","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ L","offer_id":45625988546617,"sku":"8115792_11498","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ XL","offer_id":45625988579385,"sku":"8115792_11499","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":45625988612153,"sku":"8115792_11500","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ 3XL","offer_id":45625988644921,"sku":"8115792_13422","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ S","offer_id":45625988677689,"sku":"8115792_25005","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ M","offer_id":45625988710457,"sku":"8115792_25006","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ L","offer_id":45625988743225,"sku":"8115792_25007","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ XL","offer_id":45625988775993,"sku":"8115792_25008","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ 2XL","offer_id":45625988808761,"sku":"8115792_25009","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Lavender \/ 3XL","offer_id":45625988841529,"sku":"8115792_25010","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ S","offer_id":45625988874297,"sku":"8115792_13917","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ M","offer_id":45625988907065,"sku":"8115792_13918","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ L","offer_id":45625988939833,"sku":"8115792_13919","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ XL","offer_id":45625988972601,"sku":"8115792_13920","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":45625989005369,"sku":"8115792_13921","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sky Blue \/ 3XL","offer_id":45625989038137,"sku":"8115792_13922","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":45625989070905,"sku":"8115792_10774","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":45625989103673,"sku":"8115792_10775","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":45625989136441,"sku":"8115792_10776","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":45625989169209,"sku":"8115792_10777","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":45625989201977,"sku":"8115792_10778","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":45625989234745,"sku":"8115792_13421","price":59.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0786\/9651\/3593\/files\/cotton-heritage-m2580-i-unisex-premium-pullover-hoodie-black-front-69c1fcd59eb2f.jpg?v=1774320877","url":"https:\/\/captainsquidwirth.com\/products\/useless-but-unstopable-unisex-hoodie","provider":"Captain Squidwirth","version":"1.0","type":"link"}